Snack Sneaking Strategies....

I believe that the joy of snacking is enhanced by sneaking said snack as opposed to being given it. In other words, stuff tastes better if you steal it. This is something most dogs know and practice religiously. Now this isn't to say that they will turn down a snack if offered, but it's always better if you can get one when no one is looking, or in Mira's case, even if they are.


 I  heard a great snack story lately that involved my sister's dog Gracie. Now Gracie is a senior with a big ole smile and gentle ways. She also has penchant for watermelon. A while ago my sister, Mary Lou and her husband, Jerry, were sitting around eating some watermelon on a hot day. Being the generous person she is, Mary Lou offered Gracie a bite. Gracie took her up on it and took the whole slice and ate it. Now I think as opposed to being a steal the snack incident it was a lack of communication. Mary Lou, as with most dog owners, are not aware of the subtleties of dog manners. Now I know that when you offer a dog something, they just assume that the whole piece is for them. Try offering your dog a bite of your sandwich next time and see if he/she doesn't swallow your whole hand! It's not bad manners, just a dog's way of thinking.

One of my best dog/snack story took place years ago when my ex and I lived in San Diego. We had a back deck that had a jacuzzi installed in it. The top edge of the Jacuzzi was flush with the deck. We were having a cookout and one of the guests was sitting in the whirlpool and had her hand elevated so as not to get her hamburger wet. We also had an elderly Beagle who was a  snack freak. The Beagle's name was Bagle. Well, Bagle saw this scene and a nonchalantly as possible cruised right by this woman, relieved her of her burger and kept on going. This lady didn't know what to do. Trying to keep from laughing too hard, we gave her another burger and put poor Bagle in the house. Bagel was a master at sneaking snacks. She could open up a refrigerator with either paw. Most dogs are either right pawed or left pawed kind of like humans. Now Bagel would not only steal snacks, she would hide or bury them in the house. One day I was on the phone and noticed the big pot my dead cactus had been in. Yes, I admit I killed it. Nobody told me they shouldn't be fertilized. Back to the story. Anyway, there was a piece of what appeared to be cling wrap sticking out of the planter. I took hold of the cling wrap and pulled and unearthed an almost full pound of bacon. Bagle was standing there giving me the stink eye as if to say, "get your own bacon". I wound up having to bungee cord the refrigerator door to keep her out of the frig when I wasn't at home.

The Doos also have their unique ways to steal food. Sunny's favorite thing to do with purloined goodies is to hide them under my butt or under the bed pillow. If  I'm sitting down, he just takes whatever it is and starts to use his nose to stuff it under me. This works alright if it is a rawhide bone or something else. Works out for him, not so well with me. If it is a sandwich or something it doesn't work at all. Come to think about it, maybe it does work, I don't want back a sandwich that has been smushed by a dog nose and stuck on my butt so he usually just eats it in that case. He's pretty brazen about stealing from other dogs, except Lotto who will kick his ass if he looks cross eyed at her.

Speaking of Lotto, she is very tactful when it comes to me, she just sits there are give me the "big eyes". You know the look, the I'm so cute how can you resist me. Most of the time I can't. When it comes to all the other Doos she just casually walks up and relieves them of whatever they have and calmly walks off with it. Nobody messes with the queen. There have been times when I have passed out rawhide bones and the next thing I know, Lotto has all six. When ever she takes something of Sunny's, he comes to me and starts to bounce and whine. It's a particular sounding whine and he has knit his brows together and wants to lead me to Lotto and whatever goodie she stole from him. Of course it doesn't seem to matter to him that what got stolen was probably stolen from another dog. I usually just tell him to just go get it himself. Knowing full well that even he doesn't mess with Lotto.

Siren steals things and then hides them under her blanket in her crate and then she goes and lays in her crate trying to look innocent. Usually work too. Riggins is very quiet about stealing. He learned from Sunny how to counter cruise and even how to open the oven door, so God help you is you leave any leftovers in the oven, Riggins will have it! My tip off is that it is too quiet. I'll go in there and there is Riggins and/or Sunny with a large casserole dish on the floor and feasting off of it!

Mira on the other hand is very straightforward. She doesn't care if you are there or not. She has this, "that's mine, thank you" attitude. She will take something off my plate with me right there looking at it and as she snarfs it down she is looking like, "what? you want it back now". I have had the experience with her where I was eating a sandwich and saw Mira straight across eating her way to me! She has no shame or stress from doing a bad thing. She will do this to Sunny too. He can have a rawhide or anything else and she will walk right up and take it from him. If any of the other Doos did that he would tear them apart. Now I can hear some of you saying "you need to train that dog!". Listen, she is 6 going on 7 and believe me I have tried! But then we all know that Mira doesn't play by the rules. Especially with Yorkies or food.


My favorite though is Sunfire. He is a kind of grab and go guy. He's a big believer in the "bad dog theory". You can see him start to build up. He is looking at something, straight on, nothing subtle about this dog. then  he just can't stand it anymore and he jumps, grabs,swallows and runs like hell. He has two things about him that make this a successful maneuver. First, he's fast as lightening and second, he could swallow an elephant whole. He heads straight for his crate and lays down and looks at me as if to say "what sandwich?" Now this heading for the crate is a genetic trait. Newt, Sunny's father is a very polite dog. When he senses that there is trouble lurking in the air, he heads for his crate. He does not want to be involved in trouble, he is a very good boy.. On the other hand, Sunny will do the bad thing and then head for his crate as if to say, "I know that I am going to get punished so I'll save you the effort and put myself away". Sunfire on the other hand puts a new spin on it. He speeds to his crate and then gives you the "what bad thing?"" look. Of course this is usually implied with some evidence on his muzzle such as crumbs. The look is usually followed by the "big eyes" meant to melt my heart. On occasion it works. Sunfire is only three and Sunny's son and it's very hard for him to be good for a long while. At the end of the day when I talk to all of them, when it comes Sunfire's turn we decide whether it has been a good or bad day for him. Either way, he lays his head in my lap and gives me that "I love you mom" look. Today was not a good day for Sunfire. He was bad in so many ways, I can't even count. But tomorrow is a brand new day and a new start for him. Yo9u gotta love those spots........